Thanks to TWitter user @DeekyMD, I became aware of the following “response” to “Same Love” by Christian rapper Bizzle:
There’s a lot I could say about this video, a lot which is quite exemplary of religiously-motivated anti-gay sentiment at large. I could talk about the underlying Christian supremacy in parts of it. I could talk about how Bizzle claims there’s no such thing as “gay oppression” despite stories about anti-gay bullying, violence against LGBT people, and the fact that you can be fired for being gay in 29 states and being transgender in 34. I could talk about the audacity it takes for him to then turn around and complain about “violence against Christians” (many alleged instances of which are exaggerated or trumped up by the anti-gay industry in an attempt to paint themselves as martyrs I might add) by LGBT people and their supporters. I may talk about some or all of those things in the future. (This video is a veritable “goldmine” of such garbage that can and should be laid out for all to see in its complete ugliness.)
Today, I want to focus on the following statement at the 1:09 mark.
And I’m sure that you lust like I do, just in a different form. But I’m married, so if I give in to mine, I’m a cheater. But if you give in to yours, you just fight to make it legal.
What gets me about that statement1 is that the man completely ignores the fact that he’s comparing two completely different things:
- A married man — who has committed to a woman and promised her sexual monogamy2 — breaking that promise and becoming sexually involved with another woman.
- A person — whose relationship status is unspecified and who has given no promises of sexual monogamy — choosing to become sexually involved with someone of the same sex.
The bolded parts of those two descriptions underlies exactly why these two situations are completely different. The person in the first situation has entered into a relationship built on certain agreements, including sexual monogamy. Breaking those agreements is a matter of breaking one’s word. It’s also a matter of undermining the trust that such a relationship is built on and that is absolutely essential to maintaining that relationship. That’s a big problem.
But the person in the second situation? There is no such relationship or agreement. There is no promise of monogamy to be broken. There is no violation of trust. There is no relationship that will be destroyed by said (nonexistent) violation of (also nonexistent) trust. There is no moral wrong being done here3.
The problem with Bizzle’s comparison is that he has failed to draw an analogy to what exactly makes the situation wrong and how that carries over into the second relationship.
I posit that this is because to Bizzle, it’s not actually the breaking of a promise or the violation of trust that makes the first situation wrong either, but the fact that it goes against one of God’s rules. I’ve noted this tendency of some Christians to reduce morality to nothing more than obeying Divine dictates. I’ve noted how this sort of simplistic thinking causes them to do horrible things, like erase victims of abuse. Once more I want to call attention to it here.
I am convinced that one of the biggest problem with certain segments of Christianity — especially those segments that seem far more interested in moralizing about others rather than seeking out what it means to live moral lives themselves — is their refusal to develop a more mature framework for their moral view than “[My interpretation of] God says so.”
Then they get completely confused when (and leap to ludicrous explanations to explain why) those of us who don’t believe in their interpretation of God or his “say so” don’t find their arguments compelling at all.
1Well, besides the fact that yet another anti-gay bigot is immediately reducing all same-sex relationships to a matter of lust and sexual gratification and no one is challenging him on it.
2Yes, I’m pointing out that Bizzle is in a monogamous marriage and want to make a point of noting that not all marriages or relationships are monogamous. How other people choose to construct and negotiate their relationships is entirely up to them and I refuse to diss those who reach a consensual agreement to build non-monogamous relationships together or throw them under the bus to prove “not all gays are like that” or engage in some other form of approval seeking by being “the right kind of gay.”
3Say a gay man is in a relationship with another man wherein the two have agreed to sexual monogamy, then goes and have sex with someone else. Then there is the broken agreement, the violation of trust, and the undermining of the relationship he is committed to. In that case, it is not only analogous to the first scenario, but is identical to it. But that’s the thing, Bizzle is trying to generalize this into all same-sex relationships.