Witchy Questions: What is your favourite type of candle to use?

This post was inspired by Question #42 from this list.

I’m a huge fan of these small candles, which I’ve found you can find in just about any witch or New Age shop. Also, note that I have no relationship to the seller who I linked to. I am not recommending you buy from them (nor am I discouraging you from doing so) nor do I get anything if you buy from them. Sometimes, a link is just a link. In this case, it’s a link to a convenient picture.

But I like those candles because they tend to burn down completely in an hour or two. Very convenient for the witch on the go who doesn’t want to spend days extinguishing and re-lighting a candle that lasts for hours.

For ritual purposes — such as quarter candles, deity candles, or similar candles that you want to re-use from ritual to ritual — I’m a huge fan of pillar candles in glass jars. I like that they’re self-contained and not dripping wax all over everything. And as long as you can keep the wick exposed, when they cool, the melted was becomes a part of the burnable candle again.

Witchy Questions: What’s the craziest witchcraft-related thing that’s happened to you?

This post was inspired by Question #41 from this list.

I have to admit, readers, that I’m a bit annoyed by this question. And it’s not just because I haven’t had any “weird” experiences. I’m a highly empathic witch with some mediumship ability. I’ve also mentored other people and have had some rather intense experiences while mentoring them, experiences which I will not share without the express permission of those people. So yeah, I could share a few tales here.

But those tales are not the point of my practice. I feel like despite all our talk about how Wicca, other forms of witchcraft, and Paganism being about spirituality and everyday life, we seem to quickly flock to the tales of the extraordinary and “weird.” That just seems self-defeating to me.

The only time I really like to talk about my “weird” experiences is when I’m talking one-on-one with someone who has had their own “weird” experience and needs a little reassurance that they’re not just “crazy.” In that case, it’s helpful to say, “Yeah, this sort of thing happens. Let me share a similar experience I had.” But after that, I think it’s time to explore why they had that experience and what they might want to learn from or otherwise take away from that experience. It’s time to re-apply it to “everyday life.”

Witchy Questions: What is the first spell you ever preformed? Successful or not.

This post was inspired by Question #40 from this list.

The first spell that I clearly remember casting, ironically enough, was a spell to help a friend find a new home. They had been looking for a while. I decided to do a spell using a poppet and a small planter, the kind that you might use to get seedlings started. The planter represented my friend’s perfect home, which I cleansed with incense smoke and then blessed by sprinkling various herbs (I forget which ones) into it. Then I set the poppet, representing my friend, into it, showing her finding and buying the home.

She made an offer on a house and had it accepted about three days later. I don’t generally brag about the magic I do, but I was quite proud of this one. Probably because it was my first real effort at doing magic.

Witchy Questions: What is your favorite witchy book, both fiction and non-fiction. Why?

This post was inspired by Question #39 from this list.

I am a huge fan of Terry Pratchett’s books about Tiffany Aching. I listened to The Wee Free Men on audio-book over fifteen years ago. The thing I love about these books is that it actually downplays magic as part of what witches do and explores what it means to be a witch in terms of mindset as well as other ideas, such as the importance and power of stories.

In the realm of non-fiction, I would say that my favorite book is just about anything written by Diana Paxson, who I suspect might not refer to herself as a witch. But whether you’re talking about her tome on runes or her guide to deity possession, she offers a lot of helpful information for many witches (though I admit atheist witches may find her less helpful) can access easily. Paxson tends to be well-researched, has personal experience to offer, and writes in a style that is easy to follow.

Witchy Questions: What is your favorite witchy movie?

This post was inspired by Question #38 from this list.

My favorite movie involving witches is Hocus Pocus, hands down. Some people might challenge whether that can be rightfully called a “witchy movie” because nothing in that move bears any resemblance to actual witchcraft. That’s a true statement and that’s exactly what I love about that movie.

It was a bit of fun that unabashedly played with old Halloween tropes and witch-hunt inspired myths. It also made it clear up front that this is what was happening. No one walked out of the theater thinking that the Bette was representing modern witchcraft practice in the slightest. This freed us up to laugh and enjoy the movie without answering endless questions the next day from people who wanted to know how to get their own book of spells made from the skin of humans.

I enjoy movies like Practical Magic and even The Craft (yes, there’s a real witch who can find a couple nice things to say about that movie), but I also feel there will always be problems with trying to make a movie that resembles “real witchcraft,” but feels they have to go into supernatural stuff to make it interesting. The “real” stuff will always get lost in the sensationalism.

I feel that if anyone ever hopes to make a truly good movie about “real witchcraft,” they’re going to have to get out of the speculative fiction genres and probably work on a drama. Maybe a movie about a couple witches just trying to raise their children in a small town in the South. Or maybe a Druid navigating the loss of a loved one and the grieving process involved. An everyday scenario in which the movie explores how one’s spirituality interprets and helps them navigate it.

Until then, I’ll have fun with my hilariously evil Sanderson Sisters.

Witchy Questions: How do you incorporate your spirituality into your daily life?

This post was inspired by Question #37 from this list.

I think a huge portion of everyday spirituality was covered by my podcast episode on the everyday sacred. Much of working my spirituality into daily life is just doing little things to help me remember that I and everyone and everything around me is sacred. This is reflecting in the fact that the coworker I’m talking to is another part of the Sacred Whole (so maybe I should rethink how I’m treating them). Or taking a moment to check in with my body, thanking it for getting me through the day so far, and asking if there’s anything I can do to keep it going.

Everyday spirituality also comes in those moments when I chant “Hail Freyja! Feed the flames!” and seek to rekindle my passion for and enjoyment of life.

Everyday spirituality is easy when you make spirituality about living and life.

Witchy Questions: What is your favorite type of magick to preform?

This post was inspired by Question #36 from this list.

I tend to prefer keeping my magic simple. I’m not the kind of person who comes up with complex rituals with lots of wordy chants, spell components, and complex instructions. Most often, I prefer to just visualize my objective and send that out into into the universe with a few words. Or I might light a candle or two if I feel the need to have something more concrete to focus on or do.

House-hunting brain is a thing, right?

You may have noticed that posts have been a bit spotty and occasionally light. This is because Joe and I are in the process of finding and buying our new home. We just got pre-approved on our mortgage last week and started touring homes with our real estate agent this past Sunday.

It’s been an interesting experience, sorting through the listings to find the ones that we actually even want to look at, then find out which ones already flew off the market while we were making that decision or turned out to be no good upon looking at the details. (I’ve quickly learned that “rehab loan” is code for “run away as fast as you can,” at least if you’re a first time buyer looking for something you can actually move into.) We ended up giving our agent a list of five properties we were interested in checking out. In the end, we ended up seeing three of them, plus a fourth one that just came on the market Saturday evening. By some miracle, she was able to get us in to see that one Sunday as well.

That’s the one we made an offer for. Just twenty four hours after it was even put on the market. Ours isn’t the only offer, either. In fact, the listing agent will present our offer and the other offer(s) (we know there’s at least one) to the seller this evening, who will then give us a final decision. After that, we either learn how to walk through the process that gets us into the home or we start the search again.

The process hasn’t been too terrible, especially now that we have an agent helping us. It’s mostly just a matter of keeping things moving. Responding to emails, texts and calls. Looking at new listings as soon as they are sent to us. Reviewing and digitally signing the offer. And then waiting. The waiting is probably the worst part.

The net result is I’m often mentally exhausted. So posts my be a bit sporadic here, though I do want to keep the momentum going as much as possible.

Witchy Questions: What is your favorite season?

This post was inspired by Question #35 from this list.

I grew up in Tioga County of Pennsylvania, not far from the Pennsylvania Grand Canyon, which is well-known for its fall foliage. (To be honest, the image in that article doesn’t do it justice.) It was always a delight to watch the trees go from green to being adorned in halos of red and gold. It’s a sight that I still occasionally enjoy going home briefly to catch a glimpse of.

Another thing I love about the fall is the weather here in the Northeastern United States. We’ve escaped the heat of July and August, but are not yet to the bitter cold temperatures of December through February. This is a time of year where our light jackets reappear and you can run around outside. It’s like Spring, but usually more dry. And you get the view of the lovely leaves.

There’s also that sense that the world is slowing down again, ready to go dormant, which appeals to my too-busy mind. (Seriously, I wish my often over-active brain would learn to be more like the earth in the Fall.) To me, that time of year offers the promise of rest. I am a bear, maybe even hibernation. Wouldn’t that be nice?

Witchy Questions: Do you meditate?

This post was inspired by Question #34 from this list.

One of the practices I’ve ben trying to work on regularly is just spending a few minutes connecting with my body. I will close my eyes and try to calm my mind. Then I will breathe deeply and focus on my body. I try to get a feeling for each muscle in my body and gauge its state and how it is feeling at that moment. This is an important exercise for me because I’m the kind of person who gets “stuck in my head” a lot and forgets to pay attention to my body, how it feels, and what it’s trying to communicate with me.

Another thing that I’ve been doing lately — though other distractions have gotten in the way for the past week or so — is light a candle and start out by reading this invocation to Freyja, Afterward, I’ll sit there and think and repeat “Hail Freyja! Fan the flames!” in my mind like a mantra as I try to feel her passion and zeal for life rise in my body.

The thoughts of a gay witch living in upstate New York.