Not at my wedding!

Earlier today, Lauren and I got joking around. In the process of our joking, she asked me when I’d be donning a white gown. I gave her an answer that more or less amounted to “never.” Silliness ensued, and she ended up posting an obviously edited, but hilarious photo. Of course, this whole thing was particularly funny, because one of the running jokes whenever the idea of two guys getting married that invariably comes up is the question, “Who’s going to wear the white dress?” At least I think it’s a joke.

But setting the jokes aside, I am inclined to answer that question for myself. At my wedding (unless my fianc? manages to offer me one hell of a compelling reason), no one will be wearing a white dress. Because, to me the idea makes no sense at best and is downright offensive at worst.

I am a gay man. I am not a crossdresser. I am not a transvestite. I am not a transsexual. While I might put on a blouse and skirt on rare occasion just for the fun of a given situation, dressing in women’s clothing simply isn’t a part of my normal life. So why would I want to introduce it to the solemn occasion of sealing my commitment to the man I hope to spend the rest of my life with?

I certainly wouldn’t do it for the “laughs,” as was my reasoning for donning women’s clothing in the past. Those kinds of “laughs” simply have no place on my wedding day either. Nor does the kind of political statement (in the form of parody) that I’ve heard some people posit as a reason for doing such a thing have any place there. My wedding day will be about myself, my love, the love we share, and the commitment to one another we’re making. Playing around with traditions just for the heck of it would only detract from those themes.

I don’t know what my love and I will wear during our wedding. Maybe we’ll booth wear tuxes. Maybe we’ll just go with suits. I wouldn’t even rule out my daily casual attire. But I know there will be no white dress, because it just doesn’t fit in with what I want my wedding to be about.

Besides, what would be the point in me wearing white? All my friends know better anyway. 😉

6 thoughts on “Not at my wedding!”

  1. I know that tuxes are much cheaper than dresses. Plus they are rentable, dreasses aren’t. Hell, I might just don a tux for the cost reason alone, what the hell, eh?

  2. Honey, I’ll bet you’d look great in a dress…why with all your sitting around all day doing blogging, you must need one to cover….well, you know….Hope you have a happy day.

    Gay Priest
    P.S. If you need a priest to do the ceremony, I’ll be glad to do it. I don’t give a damn what my bishop or anyone else’s thinks.

  3. Well, this is why for MY wedding (if Joe and I decide to tie the knot) I have ordered a kilted skirt and sash in the Clan Arthur tartan (you can go to or to see what the tartan looks like). The clan also sent me a lapel pin/badge with the clan motto on it; only clansfolk can wear this, so I’m told. But even though many don’t understand why I don’t want the white dress, I insist upon wearing the tartan.

    I think Joe himself would wear his traditional vitki gear: a dark blue tunic which is lined with burgundy satin trim, and burgundy pants with his knee-high boots. He has a belt with fleur-de-lis conchos all around it.

    Hey…..there’s a couple of options for you. If you wanted to, you could have a kilt made in whatever tartan your clan would be, and wear that with the traditional Prince Charlie jacket, the hose, etc. It’s a really dignified look, if you ask me. I love it.

    You could also go with medieval gear like lots of pagans do. You know, the SCA type of stuff.

  4. Gaypriest obviously doesn’t know you well at all and has not read this blog. You are a PAGAN for crap’s sake!! Would you really want to have a Christian priest’s blessing on your nuptials??

  5. Tracie,
    Gay Priest does all kinds of weddings–from Wiccan to Southern Baptist…you can’t imagine…we even do them for nudists…now that’ll give one a rise…no pun intended.

    Now, Jarred, I am not a troll, sweetie, and you must get over yourself and quit this silly blogging on Christian sites if you are truly a genuine Pagan. Are all Pennsylvanians nuts?
    My grandmother was born in Philadelphia, but I never held it against her.

    Gay Priest
    P.S. Jarred, have you tried the South Beach Diet yet? Looks like you might need to, especially if you’re going to the beach this summer and want to wear that thong!

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