A while back, I had a friend who heard someone mention “sour grapes” and they were confused. This friend had never heard (or had forgotten) Aesop’s famous fable about the fox and the grapes. Without the knowledge of that story as the context for the phrase, they were puzzled by what the other person meant by “sour grapes.” Fortunately, it was easy for me to relate the story of the fox and the grapes to my friend and give them that context. Fortunately, I was there to do so.

Recently, another incident happened that has me pondering phrases people have no context for and finding something somewhat concerning going on in some witchcraft and Pagan communities. it seems that a number of us are divorcing certain statements from any context. The most recent incident that got me thinking about it was a discussion centered on the aphorism “if you can’t hex, you can’t heal.” To be honest, the interpretation that the individual who started the conversation suggested a newcomer to witchcraft might take me floored me. I offered a summary of how I interpret the phrase and the context in which I occasionally invoke that aphorism.

As I wrote my response, I considered how the conversation I was having played a huge role in determining whether I brought up the statement. So I decided to add that fact to the conversation:

Granted, “if you can’t hex, you can’t heal” isn’t exactly a phrase I’d be tossing out to newbies. Or using outside of the context of a conversation about how our magic/actions have far-reaching consequences (including unintended consequences) and we need to take responsibility for that.

The other person noted that they see the phrase phrase thrown around frequently, and I can certainly understand why that would bother them. I can also see how someone who was new to witchcraft and encountered that statement without any further context might interpret it — as my conversation partner suggested — as an indication that you actually have to learn how to cast a hex before you can do healing magic.¹

I suspect there are a lot of phrases and aphorisms that tend to get thrown around in witchcraft and Pagan circles without important context,² and I think that’s unfortunate. Especially when those who have no way of discovering that context on their own encounter those random statements. I also think that this tends to rob those aphorisms of further discussion and the exploration of the nuance to properly understand such statement.

I also worry that rather than being illustrative statements that encourage the start of a conversation, they’ve become little more than thought-terminating cliches. Having read Cultish by Amanda Montell, I will simply note that I’m deeply concerned about the dangers that lie in that direction.

So what is the solution? I don’t think we should banish these aphorisms and other statements from the discourse. However, I think it’s important to re-evaluate how and when we use them. That way we can better assure that when people new to them encounter them, they also have ready access to the context and nuanced conversations that they arise from and rely on for proper understanding.

Post History: I wrote, proofread, and revised this post on August 25, 2024.

Footnotes

1. That is an idea that just boggles my mind. I think that any tool that can be used for good can also be used for ill and acknowledging that is important. But I certainly don’t think you need to learn how to stab someone effectively with your kitchen knife before you learn how to use it to chop vegetables, if you’ll forgive the analogy for the sake of ludicrosity. ↩︎
2. I would argue that both the Wiccan rede and the threefold law are two more obvious and prominent examples. ↩︎