Incorrigible!, Scene One


Queer:  A flamboyantly gay man in his mid-thirties.  Bears a striking resemblance to the playwright.

Straightboy:  A slender, fit man in his late teens or early twenties. Has a brush cut and looks like he works out a lot.

Straightboy Too:  A friend and near carbon copy of Straightboy.

Clerk:  An easy-going, mellow gentleman in his early forties.  Knows Queer, who is a regular customer at the gas station.

Bystanders:  A small group of people of various ages and genders.


The gas station where Clerk works.  Straightboy and Straightboy Too are at the counter and Queer is standing directly behind him.  The bystanders fill out the line behind the trio.


Straightboy Too:  Do you need to see my ID, too?

Clerk:  Yes.  (Takes the card offered by Straightboy Too.)  I can’t take this ID.  I see you have a New York driver’s license.  Give me that.

Straightboy Too:  (Handing over a second card.)  You can’t take military ID?

Clerk:  They don’t have a barcode I can scan, so no.

Straightboy Too:  (Collects his ID and turns to Straightboy.)  I’ll go move your truck to one of the pumps.  (Exits.)

Straightboy:  (Turning to address everyone in line behind him.)  I’m sorry it’s taking so long.

(Several seconds pause.  Queer looks mildly amused at this point.)

Straightboy:  (Turning to Queer.)  I’m sorry to slow things down.

Queer:  (Smiling and affecting a nonchalant tone as Straightboy turns to face Clerk again.)  That’s okay, hon.  You’re cute so I’ll forgive you this time.

(Straightboy turns with a startled, disbelieving look.  Queer continues to smile and Straightboy turns around and finishes paying Clerk before exiting.)

End Scene

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