#changingpathschallenge2024: Reconnecting

Most days, it feels like our modern society is designed to disconnect us from everything.

  • It disconnects us from other people.
  • It disconnects us from our heritage.
  • It disconnects us from our own bodies.
  • It disconnects us from our emotions.
  • It disconnects us from the rest of the animal kingdom.

Is it any wonder we often feel lonely and isolated? We desperately need to get reconnected to these things. For me, my spirituality plays a significant role in that reconnecting process. I often say that my religion is a celebration of life, and reconnecting ourselves to these various things we’ve allowed ourselves to become unplugged from is a part of that celebration. It’s also an important part of maintaining and enhancing that life.

  • Reconnecting to other people and forming a community provides us with support.
  • Reconnecting to our heritage (in as much as is possible) allows us to better understand who we are and how we’ve become that person.
  • Reconnecting to our bodies enables us to live fuller lives rather than feeling like brains trapped in a meat suit.
  • Reconnecting to our emotions allows us to feel fully human again rather than unfeeling automatons.
  • Reconnecting to other living things helps us understand our place in the world over all and is an important step in connecting with the numinous.

That’s a lot of reconnecting to do. And I think the process of reconnecting to everything is a lifetime process. Maybe even a process that spans several lifetimes. But I also think doing so is well worth it.

(This blog post is part of the #changingpathschallenge2024. Be sure to read Yvonne Aburrow’s post to learn more details about the challenge.)

#changingpathschallenge2024: Nature

Image: A picture of the Genesee River from the Gorge Trail in Letchworth State Park. Taken during my birthday hike in 2015.

I’ve hiked off and on for much of my life. It’s an activity that I’ve gotten fairly serious about at some points while walking away from it at other points. The last time I got into hiking was from 2013 until about 2015. In fact, the above picture is probably from one of the last hikes I took.

I enjoy the sense of seclusion and isolation from the bustle of civilization that I experience with hiking. While on a good trail, it’s just me, whatever companions I’ve chosen to invite along, and the beautiful views. I’d often hike alone, with my own thoughts my only companions. Such an environment is practically a breeding ground for new perspectives on old ideas and new solutions for old problems.

And yet, while out in nature and being isolated from most of human civilization, I don’t feel quite alone. I’m surrounded by the sounds of wildlife and am often blessed with glimpses of the occasional animal. An encounter with a bird or a deer can remind me that I am not alone in the world and humans are not alone in this world either. It can also remind me that all life on the planet is connected.

These days, health issues and higher priority activities keeps me closer to home. To be honest, I don’t think I could hike the gorge trail pictured above any more.1 But I still try to keep the lessons I’ve learned from hiking in mind years later. And I try to remember that even in my suburban home, I am still a part of the greater community of the world. The community that is made up of more than just humans.

(This post is part of the #changingpathschallenge2024. See Yvonne Aburrow’s post for more details about the challenge.)

Footnotes

  1. Given that I usually had to take a day or two of serious rest after hiking that trail when I was at my peak physical health in 2015, I’d say I could barely hike it back then. ↩︎

#changingpathschallenge2024: Love

Jesus Loved Me. Freyja Taught Me to Love Myself.

That was my joking answer back in 2022 when Meghan Crozier1 asked her followers what they would title their own deconstruction memoirs. The statement has stuck with me ever since. It’s funny how sometimes what we say when joking turns out to be profound truths, even if only personally true or profound.

My understanding of love was somewhat limited when I was an evangelical Christian. This was due to the fact that in that religion, I was taught that love — or at least pure love — was something that was only given out by the perfect god of the religion, who poured his love out on the undeserving — that is, everyone else. Realizing that I was only receiving love because the Almighty was giving it to me despite myself ruined my sense of self-worth, something I’ve talked about multiple times.

So when I came to Paganism, I was confronted with a new in which I could see myself as inherently worthy of love. That changed so much about the way I saw both myself and love. In time, I’ve come to realize that love — whether for myself or others — is a natural reaction to recognizing the sacred nature — which I define as the inherent value — of the beloved. If I and other are sacred/inherently valuable, how can I do anything other than love them? This allowed me to pour out love2 — both for myself and for others — more freely.

(This post is part of the #changingpathschallenge2024. See Yvonne Aburrow’s post for more details on the challenge.)

Footnotes

  1. As an aside, Meghan co-hosts a wonderful deconstruction-themed podcast with Cortland Coffey called Thereafter. I highly recommend it. I’m their number one fan. (Pay no attention to the sledgehammer behind my back.) It also occurs to me that I should see if I can help get Yvonne Aburrow on their podcast. I think many people in their audience would appreciate Yvonne’s book(s). ↩︎
  2. I will note that as an evangelical Christian, I always found it other to be loving toward others than toward myself. Much of (white) evangelical Christianity is designed this way. After all, we are commanded to love others, but deny ourselves and do things like “put our sinful nature” — which is often conflated with “the flesh” — to death. Plus, I grew up learning that “Jesus, Others, then You” spelled J-O-Y, and that was the order you were supposed to prioritize people in. The reality was, I rarely got around to the Y part, so I had more JO than JOY. ↩︎

#changingpathschallenge2024: Peace

True peace is not merely the absence of tension; it is the presence of justice.

Source: Martin Luther King, Jr., Stride Toward Freedom: The Montgomery Story

Dr. King was a brilliant man and downright prophetic. He had quite a few things to say about peace and justice, though the above quote is probably my favorite commentary that he offered on the subject.1

I hope that Dr. King and those who most directly benefited from his legacy can forgive me for using his quote as a starting point for my post. I will try my best to make sure that my own thoughts. if not worthy of following his words, at least do them no disservice or injustice.

With this quote and elsewhere, King wisely notes that a peace that is not rooted in justice — and an all-inclusive justice that applies to all — cannot last. In effect, true and lasting peace is the result of justice. So if we want peace, we must seek justice.

And yet, I might suggest that some semblance of peace is necessary for the pursuit of justice. Not a false peace, but some small island of inner peace that provides us a firm foundation from which to plan and work. I’m reminded of the the 1997 movie Wishmaster,2 In that movie, Tammy Lauren’s character talks to the basketball team she’s coaching about stillness, and speaks of an inner stillness that will help them to makes baskets if they can find it in the moment before attempting to score. This advice returns to help Lauren’s character in the climactic moment as she calms her mind in order to find the perfect wish that undoes all the harm caused by the djinn she accidentally released and traps the creature once again.

I also think that both peace and justice are not necessarily static states but involve and require an ongoing process. It is something that we will always need to strive toward as circumstances and needs arise and our own understanding of these things change. So let us continue to strive for both justice and peace, building on whatever islands of peace we and those before us have already established.

(This post is part of the #changingpathschallenge2024. See Yvonne Aburrow’s post about the challenge for more details.)

Footnotes

  1. I will note that I’m more familiar with this sentiment as Dr. King expressed it in his Letter from a BIrmingham Jail, which I’ve taken to reading every MLK Day as part of my personal process of self-examination. In that letter, he criticized white moderates, rightly accusing them of preferring “a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice.” ↩︎
  2. Back in college and when I was still a Christian, I was plannings to become a minister. I think this post and others like it demonstrate that had I continued down that path, i would have been one of those ministers who liberally peppered my sermons with pop culture references and sermon illustrations. ↩︎

#changingpathschallenge2024: Hope

Hope is that thing that gets me out of bed. It is the recognition of the potential contained within each new day and what I envision might become reality from that potential. Those visions can be well formed or they might still be vague concepts that I am developing.

My hope is bolstered by my community, made up of individuals who have hopes and dreams of their own. We share our hopes and dreams and work together on those that we hold in common. Often, we help one another with the hopes and dreams that we do not hold in common because (1) it delights us to do so and (2) we know those we help will likewise help us achieve our own personal goals and dreamsl. This web of mutual support and encouragement is another source of hope. It reminds me that I do not have to do this alone.

My deities are a part of that community, and their wisdom and faith in me also bolster’s my hope. it’s strange to consider that my deities believe in me as much as I believe in them. “You’re doing great! You got this!” they seem to say, and I take another cleansing breath as I continue my labor to bring my hopes to fruition.

Some days are rougher than others. Some days, my hopes and dreams don’t materialize as much as I’d like. It can be discouraging. And yet, as I lay down for the night, I take comfort in the knowledge that tomorrow will be another day full of yet ore potential and opportunities to turn that potential into something real.

I know that tomorrow, hope will be there to help me get out of bed once again.

(This blog post is part of the #changingpathschallenge2024. For more information on the challenge, see Yvonne Aburrow’s post announcing it.)

#changingpathschallenge2024: My values

Today’s blogging challenge prompt is “my values.” As I considered what to say about my values, I decided to look up a definition. The University Texas of Austin’s website Ethics Unwrapped defines values as “beliefs that motivate people to act one way or another.” This made me immediately think of a Threads post from the start of May in which I offered my top three beliefs:

  • Everything and everyone is sacred.
  • We are in dialogue with the Divine.
  • Creation is an ongoing process and we are participants in it.

I’d say that these three beliefs form the foundation of my morals and every decision I make. It is that dialogue and my role as a co-creator that urges to realize that the choices I make have consequences, while my belief that everything is sacred and my desire to treat all everyone and everything with the dignity that such a sacred nature requires informs my choices.

Of course, this trio of beliefs alone are not sufficient for making day-to-day choices. For that, I rely on virtues, those qualities that I have come to deem worthy of pursuing and upholding. I can’t say as I have a definitive or formal list of all the virtues I embrace and seek to uphold, but I’ve been heavily influenced by the Wiccan virtues, the Nine Noble Virtues from Asatru, and Ar nDraiocht Fein’s own list of virtues from their dedicant program.

The thing about a virtue-based morality is that it’s not black and white, nor are there any easy answers in such a system. For each situation, I have to consider the virtues I hold dear and determine which ones have something to say about that particular situation. I then must consider whether any of those virtues come into conflict in the context of that particular situation. If so, I have to decide how to best resolve that conflict. This is why i appreciate being in dialogue with my deities. Their wisdom in navigating such a complicated world is greatly appreciated. But in the end, it is up to me to decide what to do. After all, I am the one who has to take responsibility for my choice and the consequences that result from it.

(This post is part of #changingpathschallenge2024. For more information on the challenge, check out Yvonne Aburrow’s post to learn more about the challenge.)

Why I like being a Pagan: Exploring a journal prompt from Chapter 8 of “Changing Paths”

Happy Friday readers! In this blog post, I continue working my way through Changing Paths by Yvonne Aburrow. Today’s prompt is from chapter eight, which is titled “Joining a Pagan Tradition.”1 I’ve chosen the following prompt as a guide and inspiration for this post:

What aspect of Paganism are you drawn to? Is it magic and witchcraft? Nature, the Earth, or the land? Ancestors? Trees, stars, and stones? A specific pantheon of deities or a specific ancient culture?

This feels like another one of those prompts where I’ve spent this entire blog exploring the underlying question, so it’ll be somewhat challenge to distill several years of thoughts into a single cohesive post.2

I think the first thing that comes to mind is the memory of how the idea magic drew me to witchcraft (and Paganism in general) almost immediately back in 1998. It wasn’t necessarily even the thought of self-empowerment that comes with the ability to work magic, though that definitely was a factor. There was some part of me that almost craved a sense of wonder and magic — something existing just beyond the humdrum of everyday life — all my life. I remember being a kid and imagining that I could feel the flow of magical energy all around me. So imagine my delight when I read Cunningham’s book3 and realized that some people thought that was actually real. To make a pun of it, I was enchanted.

Of course, as I matured as a witch, I also began to appreciate what I might call the magical of the mundane. I came to appreciate that the separation between a magical life and a mundane one was actually illusory, which is an idea that appealed to me ever since.

I gravitated toward the Norse deities and Freyja over a period of a few years after exploring a few options. For example, i spent about a year studying Irish mythology and trying to connect with the Tuatha De Danann. This was mainly because I found a young gentleman at my local witch shop who was also studying and was a member of Ar nDriacht Fein, a Druid group4 founded by Isaac Bonewitts.

However, my friend and I discussed some of our other interests, and for me, that included the runes, which I had begun studying (at the suggestion of my first boyfriend, no less) even before I decided to leave Christianity.5 My friend noted that I practically lit up when I started talking about the runes and the lore that was often woven into interpreting and understanding them. He commented that while I clearly enjoyed learning about Irish mythology, I did not have that same passion for it. So he strongly encouraged me to seek to build a relationship with the Aesir and Vanir instead. And that’s how I eventually became a Freyjasman.6

As time went by, the ancestors became increasingly important to me. This was especially true as I learned more about seidr and other shamanistic7 aspects of Norse magic. Of course, my first introduction to the idea of honoring the ancestors likely came from my time with ADF, which includes calling and honoring the ancestors in their ritual structure. But it became more important as I began a more practical and intimate practice of working with the ancestors on a more one-on-one level.

As for honoring nature, I have very mixed feelings about the relationship between Paganism and nature, at least how it often seems to be viewed in the greater Pagan community. As someone who grew up in rural Pennsylvania, went hunting a couple times (I quickly realized I had neither the patience nor the overall temperament for it), and grew up camping, I had a great deal of appreciation for nature. I still think much of nature and spending time in nature is wondrous and important. I also think that preserving nature is crucial.

And yet, as an old rural boy, I sometimes feel that many Pagans romanticize and even idolize “nature” in a way that doesn’t resonate with my experiences with nature. I often find myself wondering if any of them have actually taken a hike in the woods or spent much time in the parts of nature not meticulously maintained by people.

Also, I feel like some of my Pagans tend to forget that humans are a part of nature, and that includes our tendency to build structures, societies, and the amenities of civilization. The “nature vs. human civilization” divide sometimes seems overblown to me at times.8

I think for me, this is a topic where my perception of Midgard vs. Utgard is instructive for me.9 On one level, I tend to view them as symbolic of the (relatively) secure places established by human civilization and the untamed places in the world that exist beyond those boundaries. I also think that we as humans need both of these places and that human survival requires us to cross into those untamed places at times. I also think that once you start thinking about these ideas, the boundary between Midgard and Utgard tend to get much fuzzier than we first thought.

That was probably quite the tangent though. At any rate, I hope you’ve enjoyed this latest insight into the things that have drawn me most and meant he most to me in Paganism as I practice it. I’d love to hear your own thoughts in the comments!

Footnotes

  1. I will note that this is the first chapter in part two of the book, where Aburrow shifts focus to exploring and following Pagan spiritualities. For those who are not interested in becoming a Pagan, I acknowledge that the rest of the posts in this series and (and the rest of Aburrow’s book) may not be as directly applicable or even interesting as part one. As such, I understand if you choose to skip the rest of this series, though I hope you’ll at least consider sticking around. After all, you may find ways to apply my own thoughts and Aburrow’s book to your own spiritual path (or lack thereof). Either way, I wish you well. ↩︎
  2. Me being me, I may abandon all pretense of cohesion fairly quickly. ↩︎
  3. Many of you undoubtedly know exactly which one I’m talking about. ↩︎
  4. I’ll note that ADF (whose new website I just noticed) is a bit different than some Druid organizations in that it does not limit itself, its members, or its groves to Celtic reconstructionism. It welcomes and encourages the exploration of any and all Indo-European cultures, their myths, and their religious traditions. However, my friend and the proto-grove he hoped to established were focused on Irish myths and culture. ↩︎
  5. This is where I make most of the Heathens reading this post groan (or worse) by confessing that my foray into the runes started with getting a copy of Ralph Blum’s “Book of Runes.” Don’t worry, though. My studies quickly expanded to sources more rooted in Norse cosmology, mythology, and lore. ↩︎
  6. Okay, Odin occasionally shows up with some lesson he wants me to learn or a change he wants me to make. But my practice and devotion is definitely focused on Freyja. ↩︎
  7. I forget where I picked it up from, but I’ve adopted the practice of describing practices that bear similarities to various shamanic practices as “shamanistic” while reserving the term “shamanic” to refer to practices that are part of a vocation in certain cultures. ↩︎
  8. In the past, I’ve asserted that the sexual (and other) energy often found at a rave in the city is as much a manifestation of nature as an idyllic site in the forest and I’m inclined to stand by that claim. ↩︎
  9. My brain is also slow-baking a retelling of the myth of Thor’s encounter with Utgard-Loki where Utgard-Loki is the protagonist, protecting the untamed places from Thor and his compatriots, whom he saw as invaders. I think this retelling would underscore the dangers of destroying the untamed places by imposing too much order on them. But I’m just a witch who thinks a certain level of chaos is needed for life to thrive in the end. ↩︎

Bonus Post: I’m joining a blogging challenge!

Hello and happy Tuesday, dear readers. I thought I’d drop a bonus post today because I have exciting news: I’m joining a blogging challenge for the month of June! Specifically, Yvonne Aburrow has announced they’re running a Changing Paths blogging/photo challenge during the whole month of June. I’ll include the image of the prompts at the end of this post.

For those curious, I will continue with my trek through Yvonne’s book, Changing Paths, on Fridays. That means that during the month of June, I will be putting out two posts every Friday. I haven’t decided whether I’ll double up on posts for Mondays or just let the blog challenge post alone suffice on Mondays.

It’ll be interesting to see how well I do at blogging every day for the month of June. That’s a lot of Bonus posts! Rather than starting the post titles with “Bonus Post” however. Instead, I will use the hashtag for the challenge: #changingpathschallenge2024.

I hope you all enjoy my posts. I’d also welcome and encourage you to participate in the challenge yourselves.

Memorial Day Musings

Happy Monday and good Memorial Day (at least here in the United States), dear readers! Given the holiday here in the U.S., I thought it would be nice to take a break (more or less) from the witchcraft and Paganism talk and share a few thoughts on Memorial Day.

I grew up in a small rural town and as part of a church (affiliated with the American Baptist Association) that considered Memorial Day very important. I was a member of my high school band, and each Memorial Day we marched in two different parades and attended the service at the end of each of those parades. One year when I was a teenager, my Sunday school decided to hold its own Memorial Day service at a nearby park and I memorized Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address during that service. So I grew up with the idea that remembering an honoring the sacrifices made by many soldiers1 and appreciating what those sacrifices did for us. I still consider that important.

And yet, as I’ve grown older, I’ve also seen how the military and the sacrifice of soldiers have become fetishized2 and weaponized to glorify war and push for more wars. In many ways, I feel that powerful elements in our country have gone to great lengths to idolize fallen soldiers — which effectively dehumanizes them — to push their own agendas. “How can you question our military policy? You’re disrespecting fallen soldiers everywhere!” To which I say, “hogwash.”

In reality, I think we owe it to our fallen soldiers — and those still living, for that matter — to look at what we’ve asked them3 to lay down their lives for. Was their justification for a truly just cause? Was it absolutely necessary?4 If we do not honestly grapple with these questions, it seems to me that we are needlessly throwing these soldiers’ lives away rather than asking them to make a noble sacrifice. To me, that’s what seems most disrespectful.

I, like others before me, suspect that much of this has been enabled by the fact that the horror of war is something we’ve become more or less insulated from. And if you, dear readers, will forgive a pop culture reference,5 this reminds me of the Star Trek episode “A Taste of Armageddon,” which was first broadcast in 1967. In that episode, the crew of the Enterprise encounters a world where wars are almost completely simulated by computer. The only “real” part of the war is that after each “attack,” the computer spits out a list of names of people who are then supposed to report to be euthanized. Members of the Enterprise crew are on planet during one of these simulated attacks and are designated as “casualties” to be euthanized. The show’s climax comes when the Enterprise crew destroys the computers that perform the simulations, forcing the planet to wage war the “old fashioned way” and grappling with the real horrors that come with war.6

I sometimes think that we in the 21st century of the real world need to take a cue from Captain Kirk and find a way to re-acquaint ourselves with the horrors of war. Because for many people in the United States, I think it’s way too abstract and unreal. Perhaps then, we might think twice about asking our soldiers to risk their own lives in certain situations. Again, I feel that we owe this to our soldiers — both living and dead — if we are truly going to honor their memories and their sacrifices.

Footnotes

  1. It’s important to note that I’m using “soldiers” here to refer to all military personnel and includes sailors, pilots, and those who fill the numerous roles in our military these days rather than just those who literally carry a rifle or other weapon onto the battlefield. ↩︎
  2. And just to prevent this post from being completely devoid of Pagan content, I’ll note that I have similar misgivings about many “Viking warriors” in the modern Heathen movement who seem to be fetishizing Viking warriors of the past while ignoring the rest of ancient Norse culture(s). ↩︎
  3. Or commanded them! ↩︎
  4. I’m often reminded of a certain quote from Foundation by Isaac Asimov, which I read back when I was in high school. In that book, one of Asimov’s characters would occasionally note that “violence is the last refuge of the incompetent.” I remember thinking of that quote when our nation’s leaders started rattling their sabers shortly after September 11, 2001 and noting sadly that they seemed to be choosing violence as our first (and go-to) course of action instead. ↩︎
  5. Well, another one if you’re reading these footnotes as you read the main body of the post. ↩︎
  6. Seriously, this episode from 1967 is just another example of how those who complain that recent Star Trek shows have “gone woke” don’t know what they’re talking about. The entire franchise has a long history of being “woke.” At least from time to time. ↩︎

Pondering how syncretic my path may be: Free-styling it for chapter 7 of “Changing Paths”

Happy Friday, readers. Today, I continue blogging my way through Changing Paths by Yvonne Aburrow. The chapter I’ll be discussing is chapter seven, which is titled “Syncretism and Blending Paths.” And once again, I’ll be free-styling it, as the prompts provided at the end of the chapter don’t really apply to me. They’re mostly geared toward people who are trying to blend two religious traditions or considering it, and that doesn’t quite feel like it applies to me.

The closest I get to blending two religious traditions is the fact that I’m a polytheistic witch and devotee of Freyja who also happens to attend online service at a progressive Christian church. But I don’t consider myself Christian and there’s very little about Christian cosmology or theology that appeals to me.1

About the only time I really considered following two separate traditions, they were both Pagan traditions. In fact, I’d say they were both witchcraft traditions. Back when I considered seeking initiation into the Alexandrian tradition,2 I already had a working relationship with Freyja and had no intentions of giving that up.3 So had I gone through with initiation, I would have been in service to both the Alexandrian deities and mysteries and Freyja and the relationship I had with her.

In other ways, I do feel like I’m a bit syncretic in my practice anyway. After all, my journey to my current spiritual practice took me through a few different traditions,4 and I feel like I picked up a little something from each one that I still carry with me. And as I’ve mentioned before, as a Norse Pagan witch, I seem to fall somewhere between witchcraft and Heathen reconstructionism. And I’d say those two influences are about evenly matched. In some ways, I’m still trying to harmonize them as I flesh out and expand upon the details of my practice. But the influences from the other traditions seem so small to me that I wouldn’t consider myself to be practicing any of them.

Footnotes

  1. You might wonder why I attend a church at all then, dear reader. It’s a fair question. The only answer I can give is that the online live chat during the service is awesome and I enjoy he conversations we have there while listening to the music and sermons. Also, I find that the pastor there preaches some great values and principles that mimic my own despite the fact that I prefer to express them through a different mythology and theological framework. ↩︎
  2. I think this is the third time I’ve mentioned this. Am I talking about it too much? Is it something I should actually do a separate post about someday? I’ll have to ponder these questions. ↩︎
  3. In the Yahoo Group where we discussed British Traditional Wicca, another seeker mentioned they already had a commitment to another deity and asked if they would be expected to give that up. At least one of the elders (I forget which tradition) seemed almost aghast at the idea and commented that if the seeker did so, they weren’t sure they’d want to initiate that seeker. Setting aside commitments is not something that crowd takes lightly, it seems. ↩︎
  4. In order: Non-initiatory Wicca, Druidry, Asatru, Norse Pagan witchcraft (which I never fully left despite exploring another path later), and initiatory Wicca. ↩︎

The thoughts of a gay witch living in upstate New York.